Confession time. I’m definitely not proud of it and I have to own up to it, so here we go.
I can often be a total flake.
Okay, just a quick caveat, I’m a repetitive flake in very specific ways. This is why I don’t set New Year’s Resolutions and other goals because I know I’d flake out of them and just end up hating myself.
These are the types of things I flake out of ALL THE TIME:
1. Creative Challenges – writer’s circles, drawing challenges, things that require me to produce something on regular intervals. I’m terrible at these. And the thing is – I start with so much enthusiasm and really enjoy it and then totally run out of steam. Or I suffer some sort of fatigue. It’s not just the production part but the participation part of admiring everyone else’s awesome creations. Not that I don’t love them all but at some point my brain shuts off or it becomes immune to leaving positive commentary and ‘likes’.
The worst part is, I usually flake after 4-5 goes at whatever the challenge is and then get super busy with something and fade away. And the challenge keeps going and I want to take part again, but I feel super awkward about it! Like what’s the best way to do a sheepish, ‘Hello, I’m back. Sorry I was a flake, not that you guys should have really noticed I was gone.’ Um can I bake you some virtual cookies?’
2. Calling people back – for those people who don’t know me very well, I’m really bad at the phone. I hate it with a passion. I’m the one who ends up talking to herself because the line’s cut off and I had no idea? And I always feel self-conscious about talking and not being able to see the other person’s reaction. Like am I boring them to death, am I even making some sort of logical sense? Why won’t you say something?! (oh, you’re listening…)
I HATE the phone.
What I hate even more is calling someone back. Because then I’m possibly inconveniencing you and chances are since I’m calling you back, whatever you wanted to talk about is probably super old news and irrelevant now but I have no way of knowing. Maybe you were just bored and wanted to chat or maybe there was a real problem and you’re still waiting for my help. There’s no way for me to know and if it was the first one, that’s just super awkward because there’s no point in chatting now but I’ve returned the phone call so we kind of feel we have to not waste that effort – and I end up being on the phone – which I hate.
So I’m a flake when it comes to calling people back. If at all possible, and I will love you to a hundred million pieces, perhaps you could just send a text, pretty please? 🙂
3. Birthdays & special occasions – okay this one is just silly. I have the best of intentions when it comes to remembering birthdays and dates. The thing is, I actually have a pretty good memory for dates and can recall most people’s birthdays/anniversaries etc that matter.
My challenge is remembering the occasion at the correct time. I never remember to wish people a Happy Birthday on the Actual day. I just won’t know what day it is. And yes, I know I can put it my calendar. But this is usually what happens:
Calendar Alert 9:00 AM: It’s dad’s birthday.
Me: Oh yeah, I should call him. But wait, it’s 7:00 PM in the US right now, he’s probably eating dinner or working the super busy dinner shift at the restaurant. I’ll call him later when it’s more convenient… *DISMISS ALERT*
7 Hours later: Oh shoot. I still have to call my dad. It’s now…*Does math in head* 3:00 AM…darn it.
(Yes, I am also aware that 7 hours later probably wouldn’t make it 3:00 AM…but that’s how bad I am at these things).
(EDIT: Come to think of it, maybe this one has a bit to do with hating the phone…hmmmm)
So special days and occasions – I am the primo flake.
And I’m sure there’s more. And that’s the other thing, I’m bad at making lists and writing detailed blog posts. I kind of just want to give you the basic idea and leave it at that rather than hash out all the squirmy, awkward details.
So can we do that, pretty please?? 🙂
And to everyone I’ve ever flaked out on as above or in some other way, I really really want to say:
I’m sorry. Here are some virtual cookies.
Thanks for reading.